The 7 Stages of Dow

After nine ominous down days on the stock market, yesterday investors were treated to a 500-point fiscal bungy jump with a worn-out cord that took them on a wild ride to the bottom, slackened and instead of springing back up, whipsawed sickeningly for the next 36 hours.  Meanwhile, the investing public had already collapsed into the various stages of Grief: Those who weren’t busy grieving and puking ran for the exits… others were caught in the shitstorm:

To add to this week’s rancid, maggot-infested stock market stew, today the business media has been absolutely spastic with frenzied and feverish rumours that the US government is “bracing itself” for an imminent credit downgrade by S&P.  The government claims the whole thing is based on a miscalculation — in the trillions.  Just a rounding error.

Look out below!

UPDATE:  History — US credit rating downgraded to “AA-Plus”.  (Plus what?)

UPPERDATE:  Krugman says S&P just making stuff up.  It’s true, none of these rating agencies should have much credibility after 2008, when they gave great ratings to the banksters’ toxic crap assets and set off the financial meltdown.

(h/t for video: Cathie from Canada)

11 Responses to “The 7 Stages of Dow”

  1. 1 janfromthebruce Friday, August 5, 2011 at 6:22 pm

    great Friday night funny!

  2. 2 Bleatmop Friday, August 5, 2011 at 6:35 pm

    I am starting to wonder if we are seeing the end of an empire. With the baggers running the show down south and Obama signing into law their batshite insane ideas, I wonder what’s next. Obama may have done some good things, but his continued insistence on “compromise” has made him one of the worst recent presidents. At least Bush had the gall to veto a budget put up by the Dems.

    On second thought, the Democrats can’t rule when they have 3/3 of the houses of power and a super majority, why am I surprised that they can’t even discuss their own issues when they hold 2/3 of them. Utter incompetence and cowardice on their parts. I’d hate to be an USian progressive right now.

  3. 3 Mike Brock Friday, August 5, 2011 at 9:13 pm

    Krugman says S&P just making stuff up

    It is true that the rating agencies have very little credibility. But neither does Paul Krugman. He’s been more wrong than they have. On everything.

  4. 4 jkg Saturday, August 6, 2011 at 7:45 am

    In 2009, the S and P reaffirmed their AAA rating with an expectation of 90 percent debt to GDP. This downgrade is now with an expectation of 75 percent deb to GDP. In addition, S&P’s models used to assess credit worthiness of very large cap companies are woefully incomplete, which results in ratings that are more hail maries. Then, there is the conflict of interest, which is pretty distinct. Frank Portnoy, a law professor, has written extensively about this for years long before the 2008 crisis. I would hazard a guess to say that Krugman has an edge over those guys.

  5. 6 JJ Saturday, August 6, 2011 at 10:16 am


    I am starting to wonder if we are seeing the end of an empire.

    Wonder no more: unfortunately, I think that’s exactly what we’re seeing.

    Unlike some on this side of the spectrum, I take no pleasure in that pronouncement, and in fact I hope I’m wrong and American Ingenuity somehow prevails. But I have less confidence in that hope every day, especially when I see how divided they are are. Divided we fall.

  6. 7 JJ Saturday, August 6, 2011 at 10:51 am

    Mike – Krugman’s Wrongness Index notwithstanding, in this case he’s probably right

  7. 8 JJ Saturday, August 6, 2011 at 11:02 am

    jkg – Maybe the ratings agencies’ Credibility Ratings should be downgraded, eh? 😉

  8. 9 JJ Saturday, August 6, 2011 at 12:12 pm

    jkg – I just read somewhere that the US debt to GDP ratio is now over 100% — for context, our debt to GDP in Canada is 35%


  9. 10 J. A. Baker Monday, August 8, 2011 at 9:50 am

    JJ, you gotta understand: empire-building costs money. We can’t afford to spend it on things that are in the Constitution like PROMOTING THE GENERAL WELFARE. 😛

  10. 11 JJ Saturday, August 13, 2011 at 4:10 pm

    But yikes — 100%??? How does that even happen? It’s nauseating

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