Archive for the 'religious wingnuttery' Category


DROP YOUR SOCKS & GRAB YOUR… whatever.  Helmets on!  We’ve got Incoming!

You’ll recall my unrestrained and unbridled joyous delirium earlier this week at the return of extravagantly anti-choice blogger Socks-on or Bust… and also my suspicion that I might possibly be the Target of yet another Prayer Assault:

Well, it turns out I was Right:

Whew… little did I know that every Monday night at 9pm Pacific as I settle in to watch Law & Order, John & The Lord are settling in with me.  I’m not very big, so there’s lots of room in my La-Z-Boy®, but I don’t know if there’s THAT much room.  But I’m getting prepared… inside my kevlar-lined, steel-belted anti-prayer helmet, my head will be wrapped in an entire roll of tinfoil to ward off the attack.

And after all, I am well accustomed to dealing with Prayer Assaults, even warding off a Full-Scale 30-day Prayer Assault during some dark days on the battlefield.  But I’m especially adept at defending myself from Prayer Assaults of the Catholic persuasion: my boyfriend is a practicing Catholic, an aged, dissolute former altar boy who claims to be praying for me non-stop at top speed, or however urgent, desperate prayers for immortal souls are delivered.  When I showed him Paycheck’s post he could barely contain his joy.  But the Law of Unintended Consequences has once again prevailed: he says he’ll be joining in on the Monday Night Prayer Assault, even at the risk of missing the first few minutes of Law & Order, because more than one person praying at the same time is supposedly more intense than 2 individual Prayer Assaults.

Good to know:  I’m going to the store now for another roll of tinfoil, and then I’m Ready.  Bring It On Boyz!

I got nothin’


Michelle Duggar and her husband Jim Bob are expecting their 20th child, the couple revealed exclusively to TODAY.

“We are so excited,” Michelle Duggar told TODAY Moms before the broadcast. Now three and a half months pregnant, the mom of 19 says she was actually surprised to discover that she’s expecting again at 45. “I was not thinking that God would give us another one, and we are just so grateful.”

Excited?  I think she really meant to say “exhausted”, but she was too tired to think of the right word.

Someone’s cranky about the Ontario elxn

Why so bitter?:

It's not the voters, it's you.

Voting Conservative is “Gutter Morality!??”  Tsk.

So you got a little spanking on Election Day… okay, you were beaten like a gong.  No, make that ‘beaten like a Cinco de Mayo pinata’.  But look on the bright side:  one less vote would have put you in the ‘beaten like a crack baby in foster care’ category.

(Almost 400 people voted for this whackadoo… think about it.  They walk among us.  Fortunately in extremely tiny numbers!)

Santorum the Rick vs. Santorum the “Frothy Mixture of Lube and Fecal Matter”

So nice to have that bible-whomping Republican wingnut Rick Santorum back in the spotlight again, if ever so briefly.

Anyone who’s ever googled “Santorum” — and why the hell wouldn’t you? — is aware of what’s commonly known as Santorum’s “Google Problem”: a highly successful campaign to mock the goofy homophobic ex-Senator by linking his name with a hilarious but somewhat graphic sexual term and Google-bombing it right up to the top of the search engine rankings.  Thanks to millions of clicks on millions of links like this one — Santorum — the satirical site with its cute little introductory brown squirt has topped the Santorum Google hit parade for years (and other search engine hit parades as well).

Santorum (the politician, not the frothy mixture) became hyper-aware of his Google Problem when he launched his doomed presidential primary run this year, and finally he’s decided to fight back:

On Tuesday, the socially conservative politician lashed out at Google, saying the company could get rid of the sexual references to his name on the search results if it wanted to — and perhaps would do so if he were a Democrat.

“I suspect if something was up there like that about Joe Biden, they’d get rid of it,” he told Politico. “If you’re a responsible business, you don’t let things like that happen in your business that have an impact on the country.”

He continued: “To have a business allow that type of filth to be purveyed through their website or through their system is something that they say they can’t handle, but I suspect that’s not true.”

Typically, in the dank fever swamps of Santorum’s mucid imagination, where man-on-dog action is the order of the day, Google is persecuting him because he’s a conservative.  But Google maintains a decidedly absolutist position when it comes to free speech, regardless of political bias, and there are many examples of right-wing google-bombing to prove it (including racist images of the First Lady).  A Google spokesman suggested the best way for Santorum to resolve his Google Problem would be for him to contact the offending site’s webmaster, Dan Savage.
An unlikely outcome, to say the least.  Savage has already offered to take down the website if Santorum would donate $5million to “Freedom to Marry“, an advocacy group for equal marriage, and he hasn’t done it yet.  (I know this because I googled it.)
You have to love the irony and lack of awareness in Santorum deciding that the best way to get rid of his Google Problem is to draw more attention to it.  The offending site is once again racing to the top of the search engine results: #3 when I checked just now.

Charles McVety, champion of censorship, free speech martyr (huh?)

Shorter Charles McVety:  “WAAAHHHHHHH!”:

An evangelical minister says his television show’s content will now be “pre-screened and censored” after his remarks about homosexuals drew complaints that were investigated by the Canadian Broadcast Standards Council.  […]

The Word TV statement released Wednesday also criticized the CBSC’s “heavy hand of censorship” and the way it investigates complaints and makes decisions.

Comparing the CBSC practices to “the Salem witch trials” and to “Josef Stalin’s Show Trials,” Word TV said the organization did not give programs the opportunity to defend themselves.

Well, here we go.  As heartwarming as it is to see Mullah McVety’s deranged on-air diatribes earning him a long-overdue boot to whatever he’s got that passes for nads, it was inevitable that it would prompt his hideous metamorphosis into “St. Chuck”, free speech martyr Silenced by the Powers-That-Be and the Rainbow Jackboot of Persecution.

And suddenly the air thickens like frozen snot as it’s heavily permeated by the foul fragrance of BULLSHIT.  Airwick, stat!

To be clear, the Canadian Broadcast Standards Council found McVety in violation of some of their rules.   Whether one agrees with the reach of regulatory agencies like the CBSC is another debate — they are what they are, and McVety isn’t so special that he shouldn’t have to play the game by the same rules as every other Canadian broadcaster.   If McVety considers what the CBSC does to be a kind of government or bureacratic overreach*, he should lobby to get it shut down so he can jabber away unhinged and unfettered. (*As Antonia notes in the comments, the CBSC is an independent, self-regulating non-governmental council made up of private broadcasters.  However, McVety’s language in complaining about them seems lifted straight from past complaints about agencies like HRCs, no doubt by design.)

But McVety doesn’t really object to overreach, as long as it’s his overreach.  And he certainly doesn’t oppose censorship, as long as he’s the censor.  For instance…

There’s “blockchildporn dot ca“, McVety’s ongoing campaign to have to the government force cable companies to block any website that hosts kiddy porn. While child porn is indeed odious, the criminal code already has it covered and law enforcement regularly ferrets out its users and purveyors.  Empowering government to dictate censorship to private cable companies seems like a convenient point of entry onto a slippery censorship slope — what else does McVety think the government should force cable companies to block?  I can well imagine.

Then there was the new porno channel (are we sensing a trend here?) that was up for licensing a couple of years ago — a run of the mill adult porn channel, no kids or squids.  But it was still more than the perpetually-aggrieved and sex-crazed McVety could tolerate, so he lobbied relentlessly against it, making feverish demands that the Harper government intervene to block its license.  (Why does Charles McVety hate the free market?)

And let’s not forget Bill C-10, a piece of backdoor censorship legislation that was proudly championed by McVety, who bragged about being responsible for it. Ostensibly C-10 was to eliminate government funding for films deemed “objectionable” (by the likes of Charles McVety?  That could mean just about anything including nature movies about gay penguins).   Whether one agrees with the concept of taxpayer funding of the arts is another debate:  Bill C-10 didn’t cut all arts funding, only specific “objectionable” projects, some with McVety-head-exploding titles like “Young People Fucking“.   (In a classic case of false advertising, YPF wasn’t actually about young people fucking at all.  But that didn’t stop McVety from chanting the title for months on end with obsessive-compulsive frequency, like some psychotic parrot — “Polly wanna Young People Fucking!  BRAAAAK!  Polly wanna Young People Fucking!  BRAAAAAAAAK! BRAAAAK!” — spittle and drool at no extra charge.)

You get the drift.  St. Chuck, Free Speech Martyr?   Live by the sword, die by the sword.

Today’s pig is tomorrow’s bacon

And so marches on the terrible twisted saga of “doctor” Charles McVety, who just got a karma-driven boot to the withered nads (FWOMP!  Ooof!) from the Canadian Broadcast Standards Council.


Mmm bacon.

PZ takes note of Canadian theocrats, does not approve (updated, with poll!)

Way back in the day, during one of my tours of Wingnuttia I stumbled over a menacingly-theocratic sounding Canadian website called “Christian Government”, which I found disturbing enough to blog about.   As is often the case when you link to another site, I started getting some traffic from Christian Government, including the good Christian who defecated this upbeat little message into my comments section.  A few other bloggers picked up the ball and we were off and running.  The “Christian Government” posse responded in their baffled and brainless way, putting up a feverish post entitled


and referring to us as “wild eyed and foaming at the mouth“.  There was some back-and-forth and great hilarity ensued.  Sadly, the article is now gone, but the Wayback Machine giveth what God taketh away.  And Shift-Command-4 preserveth.

Screenshots at 11, baby!

More recently, I found out that for some reason Christian Government had changed their name from “Government” to “Governance — I assume because “government” has a bad name among their target audience these days.  Government, governance, tomato, tomahto — they are still the same adorable gang of intellectual illiterates, homophobic haters and born-again geeks that they always were, still expounding on theories about how secular humanism is being “forced down their throats” (heh) and how the sun revolves around the earth (okay, that’s made up, but given the weirdness of some of their other statements, it wouldn’t surprise me).

Well, look out Christian Government/Governance, because you’ve just been discovered by the Most Notorioius Secular Humanist of them all, PZ Myers. Let the high-traffic, cross-border mockery begin!

UPDATE: Thanks to commenter SQ who reminds us that Xtian Government has *a poll* in their sidebar and the Godless Socialists & Liberal Heathens are coasting to a landslide victory:

I wonder what they mean by “Other”?  The Taliban?

UPDATE II: After you vote, you can read about how Filthy Children’s TV is Corrupting Young Minds.  Taste the crazy:

I arrived in the room to watch a pink bubble growing larger and larger on the screen. It looked like the opening of the bubble was at the cartoon creature’s rear end.

Then the large balloon floats off and a few seconds later it explodes, and the combination of two other characters collapsing at the explosion and the brown tinge used to colour the air from inside the balloon confirms that the balloon had been filled with flatulence.

At that point the TV was turned off until a movie was found.

Good grief, can you imagine being a poor kid growing up in the kind of Nazi environment where even the humble Fart Joke, a childhood comedy standard, is verboten?

Slap Into Action

Well well well!

Mark at the Slap decided to turn over some rocks and see what kind of tax-exempt slime lurked beneath, and look what he found.

This is a great opportunity, not only to correct the kind of bogus charity scam that most of us don’t want to see supported by our hard-earned tax dollars, but to vent some well-deserved hostility towards all things bigoted, stupid and wrong, starting with the vicious dingbats at “Exodus Global Alliance“.

If these rabid born-again geeks claim they have the power to “cure”, shouldn’t they pay their taxes like any other doctor?

Let’s rumble.

(h/t Bruce)

Tyranny of the majority overturned in California

Few things exemplify the brainless white noise of howling human dumbness and tyranny of the majority better than “Proposition 8“, the 2008 ballot initiative that banned marriage equality – by majority rule, no less — in California.  Prop 8 is infamous for many reasons, among them putting a twisted, ironic shit-stain on an election day that was being heralded as a “transformative” civil rights landmark.

But not for everyone.

So there is much to celebrate in the wake of a scathing decision yesterday by California’s district court to overturn the vicious “Prop 8”, and return gays and lesbians to the fold of the full complement of rights under the law that every other Californian enjoys. It was a crushing and well-deserved defeat for those born-again pinheads and punishment freaks who would give the state the authority to legislate “morality”.  (It’s only slightly ironic that the decision came down on the Transformative President’s birthday.)

And the opinion written by District Judge Vaughn Walker (Maddowblog has a .pdf, well worth the read), while careful and well-researched to a fault, was indeed scathing as legal opinions go, stopping just short of ridicule at times (and that in itself is an accomplishment, given the unrelenting ridiculousness of Prop 8 proponents).  It’s indicative of Prop 8’s utter inane absurdity that its proponents’ arguments fell apart like wet 1-ply toilet paper under legal scrutiny, “legal scrutiny” being that which examines and argues only The Facts.  Stripped of its imaginary monsters and fear-mongering and bigotry and religious delusions, there was little to support Prop 8.

But you already knew that.

An important aspect of the overturning of Prop 8 is that it reinforces the truism that rights are not something that can or should ever be put to a vote. Rights are innate, intrinsic to humanity, and in some lucky parts of the world, protected by the state against just the kind of tyranny of the majority that gave California Prop 8. It’s ludicrous to imagine that we can “vote” on who has rights and who doesn’t — and no decent person should even want to.

Prop 8 was a public opinion, but that is all it was — an opinion — and public opinion, even majority public opinion, even when the majority is vast (which in the case of Prop 8 it wasn’t) is completely irrelevant to individual rights.  Some of us have always known this, but for others there’s apparently a learning curve.


On that happy note, let’s congratulate blogging buddy Mark and his beloved on their marriage this week.  See?  No earthquakes, no storms, no plagues of locusts.  (I was hoping it might set off the Rapture, but no luck there either.)  Just another joyful couple looking forward to a long and happy life together.  (Maybe it’s just me, but doesn’t that sound kind of, you know, traditional?)  Cheers, guys!

UPDATE: You could set your freaking watch by these half-baked halfwits.  Right on schedule, the shrieks of “judicial activism!!!” began reverberating through the moronosphere as word spread that Judge Vaughn Walker has a private life, and in that private life, he is gay. (How this affects his ability to interpret the Constitution is anyone’s guess, but anyway…)

Unfortunately, he’s also a registered Republican, nominated first by Reagan then again by Bush the Elder, a nomination which was opposed by liberal Dems and gay rights groups.  But don’t take my word for it, listen to the conservative libertarian Cato Institute:

In other words, this “liberal San Francisco judge” was recommended by Ed Meese, appointed by Ronald Reagan, and opposed by Alan Cranston, Nancy Pelosi, Edward Kennedy, and the leading gay activist groups. It’s a good thing for advocates of marriage equality that those forces were only able to block Walker twice.

Aw, snap!

UPDATE II: Social Conservative idiocy was showcased on Hardball last night with the appearance of nutcase Wendy “Concerned Women of America” Wright, who artlessly sleazed out of answering any of Matthews’ direct questions about why she actually opposes gay marriage:

If ever there was someone who needed to be smacked across the side of the head with a phone book, pushed down a flight of stairs and set on fire, it’s that brainless twat.

Christian Government: now with 44% less theocracy

Time sure flies when you’re having fun.  It’s hard to believe it’s been three years since I discovered the disturbing spectre of creeping Canadian theocracy, personified in an ominous-looking website banner and its equally creepy site:

{{{Shudder}}}  Brings to mind visions of door-to-door Morality Checks by the State Virtue & Vice Police.  Well, we had our fun with it and other than the occasional slap or poke of a stick through the cage, moved on.  But while researching another matter this morning, “Christian Government” popped up and I noticed it seems to have undergone a conversion of sorts:

The site is using two URLs, the original “Christian Government dot ca”, and the New Improved “Christian Governance dot ca”.  But the name of the site has apparently changed from “Government” to “Governance”.  (Although they’re still “Government” on Twitter.)

Things that make you go “Hmm”, hmm?

Tripping back to April 2008 in the turbo-charged Wayback Machine, we see that at that point the site was still called “Christian Government”. Sometime between then and now it was apparently decided that the word “Government” was horribly wrong and had to be changed.  According to the Whois data, that point may have been as recently as  May 25th:

Who knows?  Maybe they decided to jump aboard the Teabagger Train and realized they shouldn’t be perpetuating the well-known fact that the religious right cherishes Big Fat Greasy Government as much as any Socialist Swine, as long as it’s doing what they want — imposing sterility taxes and keeping a watchful eye on the bedrooms of the nation, that sort of thing.

On the other hand, didn’t Marci McDonald’s book “The Armageddon Factor” come out in May?  Oh my goodness, so it did… May 11… about 2 weeks before “Christian Government” adopted its new and improved, less aggressively theocratic name.

Probably just a coincidence.

You go, girl


A 20-something Saudi female stopped and questioned by a religious policeman as she strolled through an amusement park with a young man apparently had enough and punched the officer repeatedly until he had to be taken to a hospital, the Jerusalem Post reported Monday.

Fetus fetishists and other assorted ass-backward religiofascists who come in their pants at the thought of rolling back womens’ rights: take note.  If this is what’s happening in an atavistic theo-shit hole like Saudi Arabia, you don’t even want to imagine what would happen here.

UPDATE: On the serious side of things, I hope that human rights groups will be prepared to defend this young woman, who may end up paying some heavy dues:

If the woman is charged with assaulting the officer, she could face a lengthy prison term, or a lashing, or both.

(Thanks to RB in the comments.)

You were expecting civility?

When a recent episode of the cheeky South Park depicted the prophet Mohammed in a bear suit, its creators were probably well aware of what they were setting in motion.  Some fundamentalist nutjob would take exception and threaten them on a website, the episode would be dumbly censored, fans would get pissed and retribution against the offending site would be swift and terrible:

Then the unexpected: Dan Savage posted a cartoon which, in solidarity with South Park and free speech in general, jokingly proclaimed  May 20th as “Everybody Draw Mohammed Day”:

…and outrage went viral.

The cartoonist wasn’t expecting her whimsical tongue-in-cheek proposal to go viral, much less turn into a competition to come up with the most offensive images possible.   As a result, she’s distanced herself from the whole idea:

The Seattle artist whose anti-censorship cartoon has helped spawn “Everybody Draw Mohammed Day” says she wants no part of the May 20 event, which is gaining momentum online.

“I made a cartoon that went viral but [this campaign] isn’t really my thing,” cartoonist Molly Norris tells Comic Riffs, characterizing her cartoon as merely a personal response to Comedy Central‘s censorship of a “South Park” episode last week. “Other folks have taken it over” — an appropriation she says she is distancing herself from.

Not only the cartoonist, but the creator of the inevitable “Everybody Draw Mohammed Day” Facebook page has also opted out.    After a couple of days of spittle-flecked comments and grotesque images being furiously uploaded, the creators of these benign little free speech demonstrations apparently realized things were going sideways.   They were expecting maybe… civility?  Haha.  New to the internet, I see.

Images of Mohammed might be proscribed by Islam, but there shouldn’t be anything to prevent a non-Muslim from drawing one.  And as a free speech exercise, there was a point to be made about the whackjobs who consider threats of violence an appropriate response to perceived slights to their religion:  something like, grow a pair.

On the other hand, setting aside a day for the express purpose of insulting one specific religion seems like a proposition destined to devolve into a shit-slinging competition of Olympic proportions.  Too many people don’t understand that while the right to be an asshole is an important part of free speech, it’s not a requirement.

Palin requests Prayer Shield

… to protect her against the LameStream Media:

“This nation needs you,” Palin told the women. “Know the facts. Stand for what’s right. Don’t be discouraged by the mocking of those who want to claim we just cling to our religion. I’m the first to admit — yeah, I do cling to my faith. That’s all I’ve got.” […]

(Well, that and the $12million God-given dollars you’ve liberated from these poor suckers.  But do go on…)

She asked for the women — who greeted her with an enthusiastic standing ovation — to provide a “prayer shield” to strengthen her against what she said was “deception” in the media.

A Prayer Shield — and there are 388 Prayer Warriors who are up to the task.  Too bad they weren’t around to pray away the satanic Katie Couric.

And the beat goes on…

Gee, who could have seen this coming?

It’s gotten to the point that from now on I’m going to call posts on this topic “The Daily Catholic Priest”.

Tune in tomorrow, same bat country-time, same bat country-channel, for The Daily Catholic Priest.  Because there’s always something.

Only 24 years too late

This is what’s called “a little late off the mark”, but I guess it’s a start:

Pope Benedict XVI’s former diocese says it has suspended a priest convicted in 1986 of sexually abusing minors and accepted the resignation of his superior.

The Archdiocese of Munich and Freising said Monday it had suspended a priest identified only as Rev. H. after having found that he had violated the condition that he not work with youth. The archdiocese said they had no complaints of more offences by the priest.

Right… the fact that nobody else has come forward to complain (yet) absolutely means that nobody else has been victimized by this scum in priest’s clothing.  Sure.

And it’s hard to believe they’re serious about dealing with these rotten freaks that infest the priesthood when for every case where intense media scrutiny forces the church to hold someone in its hierarchy accountable to whatever lame extent, there’s a case like this.

UPDATE: And who’s to blame for covering up all these child-molesting priests?  The Catholic League’s Bill Donohue has it all figured out.  (h/t JAB in the comments)

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