Posts Tagged 'batshit'

Back away slowly, Canada…

Potential next President of the USA:

CrazyEyes, come on down!

Yes.  It’s true. And amidst the squirming-like-a-toad insanity that’s been holding the collective USian brain in its grip lately, it could happen… a lot more easily than we probably think.

Saner people are already making a mad dash for the exits, raising the Batshit Index of the GOP’s 2012 presidential field a few more points.  Before this is all over, Charles Manson will announce his candidacy.  Why not?  He’s got the eyes for it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hey Harpie, here’s a Job Creation Program for you:  let’s get that Zombie Wall along the 49th built before 2012.

I wonder

…how many of the same people who went into paroxysms of frenzied outrage and wanked themselves stupid over the sight of Janet Jackson’s nip during the Superbowl half-time a few years ago would be perfectly okay with something like this?:

For only three hours a year do Americans actually look forward to watching commercials rather than ignoring them, muting them or running to the bathroom during them, as we do the other 8,763 hours.

That is during the Super Bowl.

In fact, commercials have become part of the entertainment during football’s annual big game, a cultural phenomenon.

So imagine a 30-second Super Bowl ad showing the graphic reality of abortion.

Fetus pron during the Superbowl — just to make those Superbowl snacks a little more appetizing, eh?  Predictably, Nurse Stanek is pretty gung-ho about the idea:

Most Americans, including many pro-lifers, would abhor such an ad.  But pro-life activists like me would be ecstatic, if such a word can be used to describe fulfillment of a passion to see a multitude of people face the truth about abortion….

Such a word can indeed be used, but there are many many more accurate words  at our disposal to describe such mania:  “psychotic” springs instantly to mind.

The plan was hatched by the ubiquitous Randall Terry, whose foetishizing derangement extends beyond all known parameters on the sanity scale.  All he needs is a cool $2.5 to 3 million and, oh yeah, the blessing of whatever network is running the Superbowl…

GOOD LUCK WITH THAT!

Rachel and the Teabagger

Last night, Rachel Maddow interviewed GOP-teabagger congressional candidate Art Robinson, who’s running against 12-term Democratic Congressman Pete DeFazio.  There were several issues up for discussion, one being the fact that Robinson’s campaign has had $150,000 dumped into it by Persons Unknown, and some truly nutty things he’s said in the past.  Perfectly legit interview fodder, right?  Haha.    Engage VERBAL CAPS LOCK:

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Okay, stop grinding your teeth, it’s bad for you.

Now picture about 10 or 20 of those in the US Congress.   Where they, you know, make decisions about things.  Things that affect real people, not imaginary aliens from the Planet Mongo.  Hey, don’t laugh: supposedly 35% of the electorate supports this whackadoo, who in spite of his claims to be a “scientist”, is anything but.  In any sane universe, that is terrifying.

Apart from that, you have to admire Rachel’s restraint.  My question for Mr. Robinson would have been:  “Do the words ‘Shut your fucking mouth’ mean anything to you???’

UPDATE: I watched this video again, and it occurred to me that this interview is such a perfect metaphor for the generational evolution that’s going on in politics and society right now… and not just in the States, but everywhere.  A lot of angry old people confronting their younger successors, and rather than working with them, being bitter and twisted that they are no longer calling the shots.

Rachel Maddow: Women candidates versus womens rights

Last night, Rachel had an interesting segment on the ascendancy of radical anti-abortion candidates in the GOP, including women, and what it will do for their share of the female vote.

This was something presciently referenced by Heather Mallick in that infamous hit piece she did on Palin two years ago: in order to win our vote, it’s not enough to run a candidate with the same chromosomes.

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Slap Into Action

Well well well!

Mark at the Slap decided to turn over some rocks and see what kind of tax-exempt slime lurked beneath, and look what he found.

This is a great opportunity, not only to correct the kind of bogus charity scam that most of us don’t want to see supported by our hard-earned tax dollars, but to vent some well-deserved hostility towards all things bigoted, stupid and wrong, starting with the vicious dingbats at “Exodus Global Alliance“.

If these rabid born-again geeks claim they have the power to “cure”, shouldn’t they pay their taxes like any other doctor?

Let’s rumble.

(h/t Bruce)

Geometry taught the Alabama way

Teachbagger!!:

An Alabama teacher has been questioned by the Secret Service after using the hypothetical assassination of President Barack Obama as a way to teach angles to his geometry students, The Birmingham News reports […]

Officials said the Jefferson County geometry teacher was apparently teaching students about parallel lines and angles and used the example of where to stand and aim if shooting Obama.

“He was talking about angles and said, ‘If you’re in this building, you would need to take this angle to shoot the president,’ ” said Joseph Brown, a senior in the geometry.

The paper says it could not reach the unidentified Corner High School teacher for comment.

No kidding — maybe try contacting the local psych ward?

I’m not that serious about the “teabagger” reference — nobody knows if this demented bozo is or ever has been a member of Teabagger Nation.  And even if he is, he’s an exceptionally stupid and vicious example of one.

But still, um, wow.

Generation fap

I really have to thank Marci McDonald for the timing of her book’s release  early last week and all the media buzz that accompanied it — for once the MSM had good reason to shine a light on Fetustock, since it underscored (with a bright red Sharpie) the book’s premise: religious fascists want to run your personal life.  The fetus fetishists’ failure to make that obvious connection and their subsequent ecstasy at the unprecedented attention they got last week is something that promises to provide snark material for some time…

For example: over at the Home of Principled Conservatism the weather report is calling for increased pressure, a relative humidity of 110% and a fapstorm of biblical proportions as the deranged “Paycheck” furiously strokes himself into a frenzy over Canada’s Imminent New Culture of Fetus Fetishizing, which he predicts will start in… Quebec!? No, really.  Now get that raincoat on, because you won’t want to be hit with any overspray, and click on the pic!:

With the other hand, he dug up one of those super-reliable internet polls, and whoops!  Fapfapfapfapfapfapfapfap:

Oh my goodness.  Oh my goodness gracious.  Well, enough of that bullshit.  While the freepsters were freeping, the pollsters were polling, and here is what they got:  two polls that both show a hefty majority of Canadians think that Harper’s Maternal Health Initiative should include abortion care.   It’s safe to say that those numbers reflect Canada’s attitude about domestic policy as well.   And what of Quebec?

In Quebec, 71% agree Canadian aid should be spent to provide access to abortions

Face it, foetishists — you were handed your asses on a plate when Dr. Morgentaler was handed the Order of Canada (hard to believe it’s been almost two years, eh?  And how’s that “blizzard of returned medals-y” thing working out for you?).  Maybe you could commission Marci McDonald to write annual sequels and release them the same week as FetusFest.

Sexual McCarthyism comes to DC

Authoritarianism on the march: it’s here and it’s queer (closeted perhaps, but still)!

Hyperbigot Christianist freakshow voted (by me) “Most Likely To Be Caught Holidaying With A Hunky Personal ‘Bag Handler‘” Peter LaBarbera of — stand back! — “Americans For Truth About Homosexuality”, wants to know if SCOTUS nominee Elena Kagan is now, or ever has been, a member of Teh Ghey Conspiracy. Because according to LaBarbera, “the public has a right to knowthe most private personal details of Kagan’s life:

In the wake of AP’s report that Solicitor General Elena Kagan is President Obama’s choice to fill the Supreme Court vacancy, Americans For Truth About Homosexuality (AFTAH) reiterates its call for Kagan to answer the question: ‘Are (or were) you a practicing homosexual?’

According to some reports it is an open secret that Kagan is a practicing lesbian — to which AFTAH President Peter LaBarbera responds:

“If Kagan is practicing immoral sexual behavior, it reflects on her character as a judicial nominee and her personal bias as potentially one of the most important public officials in America. The popular mantra — even among conservatives — is that Kagan’s sexuality is ‘irrelevant.’ But a Justice Kagan would help decide some critically important constitutional issues dealing with: homosexual ‘marriage’ as a supposed civil right; religious liberty and freedom of conscience; and the First Amendment as applied to citizens’ right to oppose homosexuality. So it certainly matters if she, as a lifetime judge, could emerge as a crusading (openly) ‘gay’ advocate on the court.

All I can say to that is:   At long last sir, have you no sense of decency?

Good night and good luck (and get fucked).  (EDIT:  As Bina would say.)

UPDATE: Oh, fun… the homobigot hate site has a search engine.  Let’s see if they’re up to date on the relevant news of the day:

Oh come on.  Surely they must have something more than a 4-year-old bullshit story about a different George Rekers (the one that hadn’t been caught yet).  This was a Big Scandal among the Christofascist Elite, after all, and AFTAH links to some of the very “ministries” Rekers helped head up (so to speak)…

Ah-ha!  Ding ding ding!How many of these deranged creeps do you think went straight to the rentboy site after reading that article?  Bwahaa!

(Post edited to use cache link to what appears to be a raging hate site.  Apologies.)

Palin requests Prayer Shield

… to protect her against the LameStream Media:

“This nation needs you,” Palin told the women. “Know the facts. Stand for what’s right. Don’t be discouraged by the mocking of those who want to claim we just cling to our religion. I’m the first to admit — yeah, I do cling to my faith. That’s all I’ve got.” […]

(Well, that and the $12million God-given dollars you’ve liberated from these poor suckers.  But do go on…)

She asked for the women — who greeted her with an enthusiastic standing ovation — to provide a “prayer shield” to strengthen her against what she said was “deception” in the media.

A Prayer Shield — and there are 388 Prayer Warriors who are up to the task.  Too bad they weren’t around to pray away the satanic Katie Couric.

Glory is fleeting

The bad news just keeps on coming for Bart “Baby Killa” Stupak:

An anti-abortion group has stripped Rep. Bart Stupak (D-Mich.) of a “Defender of Life” award he was supposed to receive Wednesday night.

Stupak was to be honored at the annual Campaign for Life Gala of the Susan B. Anthony List for his efforts to get the Stupak amendments toughening up restrictions on abortion funding inserted into the healthcare bill voted on Sunday night.  […]

“By accepting this deal from the most pro-abortion President in American history, Stupak has not only failed to stand strong for unborn children, but also for his constituents and pro-life voters across the country,” Susan B. Anthony List Candidate Fund President Marjorie Dannenfelser said in a statement.

Think Stupak might have learned something about what happens when you lie down with rabid, flea-infested curs?

Me neither.

The year of yelling dangerously

So who was the classless douche that yelled “baby killer” at Bart Stupak?  Nobody seems to know, and predictably, nobody has the parts to own up to it.

A tweet that went out last night saying it was California Rep. George Radanovich has been recanted by the tweeter, but not before it was added to his Wiki page (via Gawker):

That has since been scrubbed and Radanovich has denied being the Baby Killer Guy.    GOP Rep. John Campbell has admitted it was a Republican, but only said that it came from the row behind him where Texas Republicans usually sit.  To me it definitely sounded like a southern accent.

If I were to speculate (because it would be irresponsible not to), I’d bet it was probably that nutbar who was at the teabagger protest the other day, claiming that demons had invaded the capital, and that he “brought an abortion” to the protest with him (whatever that means).

If these fetus fetishizing whackjobs are so proud of their “principled” stand against abortion, why is nobody coming forward to admit he was the Great American Hero that yelled “Baby Killer” at the hapless Bart Stupak?  Fess up, clowns!

UPDATE: “Old Yeller” was Texas Republican Randy Neugebauer.  Supposedly he was talking about the bill, not about Stupak.  Oh sure.  Because “baby killer” isn’t a routine aspersion fetus fetishists cast against doctors, women, or anyone else who won’t do things their way.  (h/t fern hill in the comments)

Seeds of fear!!!

We cover the waterfront today, folks.  From the government-mandated spreading of seed for survival to… Survival Seeds!

YES: There is something you can do to prepare for the coming Apocalypse when Obama’s Secret Gestapo gets a lock on the food supply and redirects it to all the Elites and Insiders.  Plant a Crisis Garden for the low low price of $149 USD:

“WorldNetDaily cites strong evidence that some government agencies are stockpiling huge amounts of canned food”… Well, say no more.  You can just bet that state-stockpiled Spork isn’t destined for any God-fearing, teabagging conservative forks, bucko.  As advertised on the extremely credible Glenn Beck show:

And of course, Survival Seeds “were created by God as we read in Genesis”.  (Do these people know their target group or what?)

(via Dkos)

Nanny state conservative alert

Oh god.  DJ caught one of our favourite soconuts getting weird again with a new plan to punish anyone who gets laid on even a semi-regular basis.

An incessant advocate of Strong Government Presence in the bedroom, this time he’s proposing a “Sterility Tax” (500%!) on contraceptives.  The logic apparently goes that imposing punitive taxation on birth control, along with “procreation incentives” (like we don’t have those already, look at your tax return), would result in the production of great multitudes of anklebiters to fuel the work force and save the faltering economy — children as a government-run social engineering project, as it were.   But best of all, those evildoers who engage in procreationless sexual congress get punished for their depravity.

Seriously… I’ve never encountered anyone, online or off, who was so clearly berserk with sexual frustration and ridden with closeted carnal angst — it jumped right off the screen and started furiously humping my leg (I had to swat it away with a rolled-up Globe & Mail).

If it’s Saturday

…it’s time for Hate Mail-a-palooza at Kos. Here’s my favourite for today:

Die painfully and enjoy your weekend — makes sense to me!

Sadly, there’s more.

Miscarriage of justice

Anyone who doesn’t believe the extreme right’s obsessive focus on the fetus renders women little more than ambulatory incubators need look no further than this bizarre story out of Republicandominated Utah, where a bill criminalizing miscarriage is one signature away from being the law of the land:

A bill passed by the Utah House and Senate this week and waiting for the governor’s signature, will make it a crime for a woman to have a miscarriage, and make induced abortion a crime in some instances.  […]

In addition to criminalizing an intentional attempt to induce a miscarriage or abortion, the bill also creates a standard that could make women legally responsible for miscarriages caused by “reckless” behavior.

Using the legal standard of “reckless behavior” all a district attorney needs to show is that a woman behaved in a manner that is thought to cause miscarriage, even if she didn’t intend to lose the pregnancy.

If this bill is signed into law, it would be homicide to intentionally or unintentionally cause a miscarriage.  What??

Most women don’t even know they’re pregnant until they’re 5 or 6 weeks along.  That leaves a pretty significant window of opportunity to indulge in unintentional “reckless behaviour”… which is whatever the state of Utah deems it to be, I guess.  Drinking?  Smoking?  Snowboarding?  Eating bacon-double-cheeseburgers?  By what weird magic does pregnancy suddenly make these personal choices the government’s business?  The magic of Dumb Law, apparently.

Next up: all women of childbearing age will be required to submit to the Department of Reproduction (next door to the Department of Transportation) for monthly pregnancy tests, and issued “Non-Pregnant” licenses.  Said licenses will be needed to patronize a bar, burger joint or bungee jump.

Why not?  Elsewhere, women are being court-ordered to stay in bed in the interest of their pregnancies.


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