Woodworth’s Wank Revisited

Like many progressives, fern hill is looking for a way to unite the opposition parties, and she may have found one.

Regular readers will recall MP Stephen Woodworth’s bilious bleating on Twitter about “when life begins”, which unlike most Canadians, Woodworth contends is “in the petri dish”.  His embryo-obsessed Twit-jaculations started in December and evolved into the waste of taxpayer dollars known as the Motion 312 debate scheduled for April 26th.  There’s been a surprising dearth of commentary from our elected officials on this thing, considering the profound impact it could have on women’s reproductive freedom.  The motion is a dumbly transparent attempt to get a foot in the door to turning back the clock on rights which were hard-fought and hard-won by the side of liberty many years ago… yo, fetus fetishists, we won.  You lost.  Get the fuck over it.

As decidedly absurd as the motion is, assurances that pro-choice MPs, opposition and otherwise, will unite against it would be most welcome.  They are, after all, our only voice in the thing.  Which brings me to Fern Hill, The Uniter.

Yesterday in an Open Letter to Opposition Women’s Caucuses, she lit the proverbial fire under some pampered Parliamentary arses by reminding them of this issue and asking that all pro-choice MPs stand against Woodworth’s Wank (Fern’s nickname for 312: your suggestions are welcome!) when it comes up for debate.  Something like pronouncing it a waste of taxpayer dollars and an insult to hard-working Canadians concerned about REAL issues like jobs and the economy, then walking out in unison, would turn my frown upside-down.  (A full-on toothy grin could be achieved if the MPs were to roughly stand up, upending the debate table, and amid tumbling papers and laptops and coffees scream “Fuck you people!” and then walk out in unison… but I don’t think it’s in the cards.)

The good news is, we have signs of life!  We may see a unified opposition yet, at least on this issue.